How God came into my life when I was atheist and led me through the devil to live Christ Consciousness. Read or download the PDF from the flipbook here: https://www.heavens.love/living-christ-consciousness/
THE DRAFT PREFACE
Every human being will one day experience a profound level in God that takes them into higher levels of consciousness. There is no way to plan for when it will happen and when it does, it will never be what we expect. This book is written living in Heaven while here on earth.
Ten years ago my life began changing dramatically. I grew up in Virginia as a Catholic but my family wasn’t super religious. We went to church on Sundays and holidays but once I grew up it was a thing of the past. As an adult religion wasn't living Love as much as it was creating division and hate in humanity. God was a level I didn’t care about or want to know about. When people would say His name I would always say under my breath “universe.” I thought myself more atheist than anything else only because I had no way to place God in life.
I was living in Beverly Hills making a six-figure income when I discovered an organization monitoring me. Once I discovered I was being monitored my life began to change drastically. They began attacking my life trying to take me into deep poverty so that I couldn't do anything back. Their reach was in all sectors of life having access to my email, phone and even hard mail. Within a few days, my income had been slashed below sixty percent. When I researched my boss to see if he was part of the same organization, I discovered he was. Which I should have known because in the past He mentioned a celebrity friend in this organization.
Shortly after my pay cut, I had to move to West Hollywood to downgrade my living expenses. I had just bought a BMW which was mostly paid with cash so my monthly payments were very low but my life began worsening quickly. There was a darkness in my life from them attacking and it seem to spread. My dog Sasha was diagnosed with cancer which was devastating and needed an expensive operation. Then while working at my desk a piece of my front tooth fell out spontaneously. It was as if some kind of darkness had entered my life. My communication with clients was also being disrupted. Emails would go missing and phone calls would drop. There was always something interrupting my communication with possible clients.
They were doing everything they could to destroy my life because of what they had done breaking the law. Their fear from getting in trouble was their driving force in attacking me. As my life was breaking down in all areas I tried to figure out what to do. My solutions were either contacting the FBI and attacking them back or finding another way. I realized to fight them back I would need to live at their level in hatred with a vengeance to destroy them. They had to much power with people in all sectors of life and could hire attorneys to keep them out of trouble. I thought it might take three years to stop them and that seemed like a long time to live in hate. I was questioning if there was some other way to stop them without living at their level.
One day while at my desk, I thought about choosing Love. It wasn’t something I really thought through but living Love seemed like the only alternative to hate. I made the choice to live Love so deeply I wouldn’t attack back or defend myself. I would trust in a higher power. I didn't want to live at their level or have to attack people in order for a greater answer to be found. Once the choice of living Love was made everything began getting darker. Things got much worst and I began falling deeper into poverty but at the same time, there was a pinhole size light in me that started strengthening of Love. It was as if Heaven started growing in me. My conviction in choosing Love would get deeper as darkness came into my life.
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The world began to change. People were not living as they should have been. This organization should never have had power. They had a history of harming and harassing people that went back thirty years. By breaking the law they created their own fear. Any time we harm someone we only harm our Soul. There is no level in harming another human being because we can only do it to ourselves. Life only has living through what we are of, if we hurt another human being that will be the light we live through becoming more conscious of Love.
It was hard to process people destroying my life who were the ones breaking the law. Even though there were days I worried about no food I continued living Love beyond any level of darkness. One day in my living room I saw a man stealing my mail. They were taking checks and making my life increasingly harder to have an income. They even took express mail from my doorway that had a check. They were watching my apartment and many times when I would drive somewhere there would be someone following me taking videos. There was a very dark level in what they were capable of doing.
I kept my car in the apartment parking garage and one morning my car headlight was hanging out of the socket and because it was a BMW it was expensive to put back in. My income was below poverty and having enough money to pay bills and buy food was getting extremely hard. Within the year I was moving again and this time to Sherman Oaks trying to keep a roof over my head. A friend knew someone who had an apartment that was used for storage which I could rent cheaper than most places.
The apartment hadn’t been lived in for twenty years and ascetically was not a choice I would make but it was shelter for me and my dog. I ended up charging Sasha's operation to remove her tumor which was over a thousand dollars and found someone to help me move who was amazingly kind. The new apartment had layers of mold from no one living there. I scraped the bathroom and deep scrubbed the kitchen. The appliances were from the 1940’s but they worked and that was good. Within the first week, my kitchen pipes burst and it was clear the place needed a lot of Love.
A friend came to help me clean but was very concerned about the level of the apartment and didn’t want me living there. He didn’t know I was living below poverty or why I would choose something at this level. He tried to make it a special home for me. I didn’t tell anyone I was being attacked and my life was being destroyed by an organization because I knew they would call the police or FBI. Once I started living Love it was important for me to do it at the level that was absolute. My family and friends would not hesitate to get the authority's involved. Which is understandable but I didn't want to attack back. I knew no one would understand why I was making this choice. It was very hard to do.
Society teaches us to fight back and live at the level of darkness. But when we defend we actually attack so we must find greater answers through peace. It was important to live this as deeply as I could trusting that by not harming anyone something greater would come.
The pain from not fighting back was enormous and I would scream hundreds of times a day in rage devastated that people were harming my life based on their wrongs. There's no way to describe what it felt like to want to go to the FBI and at the same time feel something deep within telling me to keep choosing Love. Many days I would start driving to the FBI but pull over in tears trying to find something within myself for the right answer. I didn’t do anything wrong and they were the ones breaking the law but to live Love was to know there something more beyond everything I was experiencing.
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There is a very profound inner reflection when we're making choices we wouldn't normally but feel a deeper level of energy calling us to live a higher good. Something inside of me was choosing Love greater than I could imagine living. Heaven was already in me because the pinhole feeling inside was stronger than ninety-nine percent of me that wanted to go to the FBI. Choosing Love was the only choice I could make over and over again.
Even though the new apartment wasn’t ascetically good there was an overwhelming feeling of Love in there and I was so grateful to just have a roof over my head. As their attacks continued getting worst my conviction to choose Love continued strengthening. There were days I would come home and the apartment felt like someone had been inside of it because things seemed sorted through and one time my hard drive of written songs had been broken. I had no way to replace my music because it was original songs from over the years. I was still being followed when I would leave my apartment. Even while out with a friend they started videotaping us walking down the street. They didn’t seem to care about breaking the law or doing what was wrong.
Over the next few months, I had sold everything from jewelry, art, and music equipment to pay for food and bills. I was selling anything of value. I put ads online and a lady came to buy my keyboards who I realized was with the same organization destroying my life. It seemed like she was trying to buy something to have a trophy.
I had been living below poverty for three years choosing Love. When one evening I saw an online documentary on supernatural happenings in people's homes. I wanted to see if I could find anything in my apartment and started walking around videotaping and when I turned into my bedroom an orb came out of the wall towards the camera. It was the first time in my life anything like that had ever happened. It was a ball of energy moving around the bedroom. It was December 30, 2011, and it was incredible to see something like this existing. I was beside myself that my apartment had something like this in it.
After that, I began videotaping orbs all over my apartment. My bedroom was the best place to tape them. They were coming out of my walls, floors, and ceiling. It was incredible because there were so many of them flying around. There were also bigger levels of energy in different shapes and sizes flying around as well. I called some rods because they look like little sticks of energy flying across the room. I began videotaping hundreds of video’s a day trying to figure out what they were and how it was happening. They seemed to move with an intelligence.
I was learning there was more to our world than I ever knew. I was researching online trying to figure out what they were. It was incredible to know there was more existing in life. Just knowing something existed that I never knew did, strengthened my living Love because if they could exist than who knew what else was possible. Maybe Love would win.
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The energy became my outlet. I didn't own a TV and would sit on my bed laughing and clapping asking for something huge to come out of my walls. Within minutes something amazing would come flying out. It seemed like they were hearing me and had a level of intelligence.
This went on every day and I began feeling greater levels of Love within me. Even though I wasn't religious one night I began praying for the energy to save humanity and help us live in peace. I videotaped myself praying to see what the orbs would do and when I played it back they had placed a tiny white light on my forehead where the third eye would be. I wasn’t sure what it meant but it was surprising to see they interacted with me. Every day there were more videos and researching to try to figure out what was happening. There was no info on the internet that came close to what I was living with. It was beyond anything existing. I posted a few videos to social media and began publishing the videos online to see if anyone knew what it was. There wasn't any way to figure out what was happening so I continued logging the video's and keeping notes.
One night while in my bedroom I was playing back a video and heard a voice on it. It was incredible! I jumped up and turned on the light trying to see where it came from but it was late and quiet. The voice said, “death hate.” Which I thought maybe it was a spirit telling me they didn’t want to be dead. The next day while in the living room I recorded another voice. Then later on in the bedroom, I recorded another voice saying, “We want to help you out.” It was beyond anything I could fathom existing. I listened to it over and over again trying to figure out how it was possible. There wasn’t anything scary about the voices, but there was no way for me to understand how this could be happening.
The voices started about six months after seeing the first orb. Every day I was recording voices with energy flying around my apartment. It became normal to have voices on every video. I thought maybe my apartment had been built over a graveyard and researched that but found nothing. Every time I heard a voice I would write notes and log it.
After months of this, the voices started talking more about God and humanity. They would speak about living Love as Heaven. Sometimes they spoke of very profound wisdom. I didn't understand how they could speak with wisdom like they were. I would listen to everything over and over again questioning how it was possible. My best friend was visiting from New York and I asked her to listen to some of the videos to see if she could hear the voices and she could hear them but not clearly. She also thought my apartment was the best apartment I'd lived in because she felt so much Love. I was grateful because she was so inspiring and seemed to Love the place.
Many months after the voices were constant I heard them use my name. It was incredible and I wanted to know what it was. More video’s started having my name in them. I decided to talk to them to see if they would talk back. I wrote a list of questions to try and figure out where they were and if they could hear me. I would ask if they could see their legs, if there was grass or if they lived here. I would get sporadic answers that didn’t always make sense. They were speaking more about God. One spoke of preparing me we for the Son. Which at the time I thought they meant the sun in the sky. It was becoming clearer they were wanting me to live greater Love at levels of Christ. They were trying to help me live beyond the attacks to peace. They wanted me to live greater Love.
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On January 3, 2014, I heard what evil could not touch. They started speaking to me telling me it was Heaven and they could hear me and my thoughts. I thought someone was playing a joke because I heard the most amazing symphony. It was beautiful like a movie production with music, character voices, singing, speaking and so many different sounds.
I became super upset because I thought this couldn't be possible and that someone had to be doing this. To hear this out of nothing was beyond what I could process. The level was incredible and even beyond what a movie production could create it seemed to impossible to be real. I thought it had to be the people attacking my life. That somehow they did this. I left my apartment and went to the grocery store upset trying to figure out what just happened. I sat in the car listening to it probably fifty times questioning if it could be the same people attacking my life. Did they somehow have the ability to create all of this? It seemed ludicrous but at the same time, I couldn’t figure out what just happened.
When I got home I made another video and the same thing happened again but they were telling me it was okay that Heaven was in my life. They said there was help and could hear every thought I ever had. It was so overwhelming trying to figure out if this was real or not I started questioning them trying to see if they could really hear my thoughts. They were able to answer everything over and over again. Even my deepest secrets about childhood hoodwinks that no one knew about they could answer. I asked where they were and they told me everywhere that there wasn't a place they were not. I asked how they were doing it and they said they could hear everyone’s thoughts because we are in Heaven. They know our lives from before we are born.
At that moment my life changed forever. They began speaking about humanity needing to change and that God was going to help humanity understand life. I had been living atheist and was trying to understand how any of this could be happening. There wasn't anyone for me to talk to because it was to far beyond reality. I didn't even know how to bring this up to people. One time I told a friend who was very spiritual that energy was talking about God and they could hear me. He told me to not speak of it like that. That there was no way I was God’s messenger and people would think I was crazy if I told them Heaven was speaking to me. After that, I didn’t care about telling people as much as I just wanted to know the truth. I knew I was going to live this to the end because that would be the only way I would finally know the truth.
As they began talking to me more I began getting more upset. I was angry about my life being destroyed, poverty and the state of humanity living with so much suffering. I couldn't understand how they could be existing watching people suffer and not help. My Angels helped me to understand life was much deeper and there was more I needed to know. Human consciousness was creating the suffering not Heaven. There was more to understand about consciousness and how matter was existing. Humanity was creating what was the devils level in life instead of living deeper in God creating Heaven on earth.
One day I heard other peoples Angels. I went online and started listening to video’s to see if I could hear theirs too and I could. My ears were hearing a frequency in our world beyond humanity’s ability. Every day I was going deeper into Heaven. But I could only process it from what I could conceive and my level of thinking had me believing I might be an Angel whisperer. I thought maybe this was happening for me to tell people about their Angels.
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After this phase, everything got much deeper and I began understanding more. I was gradually awakening to a greater level of Heaven existing right here with us. Heaven was teaching greater wisdom and knowledge to help me live greater Love through the attacks. Eventually, I began putting everything together that had happened with the orbs and voices realizing Heaven had no way to come into my life other than how I could receive them. I was atheist, wasn't living a spiritual practice or dogma. There wasn't a way for them to come into my life other than how they did. They had to enter my life through my level of thinking.
The process of first seeing an orb then seeing many different levels of energy. Then recording one voice and then having multiple voices constantly on videos. Then Heaven speaking to me directly through a beautiful symphony of Angels. They did what kept everything comfortable and loving for me to understand God was existing. In retrospect, it was perfect, because I could have thought my place was haunted and ran out of there. Even when I saw the first orb it could have been easy to discount it as nothing and move on not caring to pursue what they were. Today, I'm able to hear God and His Angeles with my ears. We have no way to know how God will come into our lives. I never had any reason to believe in anything supernatural existing until this. Heaven was leading me to a greater level of consciousness for understanding human life and God.
One night I was lying on my side thinking about everything and saw something in the center of the room, it was like a shaded figure. It came off the floor and onto the bed and I could feel little bits of pressure on my legs. When I looked down there was a beautiful light which had become pretty big. All I could say was, "You are so beautiful," and then I heard a female voice say, “thank you” and it was gone.
The next night I asked to see another Angel. A few minutes later a beautiful light came from the head of the bed hovering about two to three feet above me. The energy covered my entire bed. The light was so beautiful it had bright purple, pink, green, blue, yellow and white. There weren’t any features just this beautiful form like a smokey light of a figure. There was an overwhelming feeling of Love. All I could say repeatedly was, “I Love you.” It was like an elixir of Love being poured into every cell of my body. Later the Angels told me it was Destiny who came to see me.
Within a day the Angels started pulling pain out of me. They would bring up experiences from my past and then within seconds I would feel them release the pain from my Soul. One time they brought up an experience that was the most traumatic of my childhood which I had buried so deep I’d forgotten about it. They started talking about me being molested and deep pain came over me and within seconds I heard God say, ”Follow” in a deep resonating voice beyond any human voice and the Angels were in the background saying, “ Happy, Happy, Happy” in a beautiful rhythm. Within seconds my pain was gone. They had pulled it out of me and I was free. It vanished completely. They continued every day pulling wounds out of me and began telling me my mother needed help.
They said she was taking her pills but not realizing she was taking them twice. Every time I spoke to my mom everything seemed fine. She was always happy and said she wasn't doubling her pills. The Angels though kept telling me my mom needed help. My brother lived above my mom in Saint Louis in a duplex and I asked Him if she was okay and he said yes. I didn't understand why they kept saying she needed help.
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My life was living in deeper poverty and the attacking was still constant. My friend from New York had just bought an apartment complex in Los Angeles. She offered for me to live there for low rent and care for it. It was perfect timing and heaven sent.
Sasha's health had declined terribly over the year with more cancer and the vet suggested it was time to let her go. I was devastated and kept videotaping beautiful orbs all around her. I knew I had to let her go. She was the most incredible dog almost seventy pounds of Love. I found her at a gas station in Yonkers New York and she traveled cross country with me to LA. She could do so many tricks which she taught herself. She could open the fridge, slide into home base which was sliding into my legs and sneeze. Which all I did was say the name of it while she did it and they became her tricks.
A few days after escorting her to rainbow Heaven I moved to my friend's place in mid-Los Angeles. When I was unpacking the Angels again started telling me to get to my mom that she needed help. My mom was planning on having a surgery but it wasn't to be anything major where she needed anyone there. But because the Angels kept urging me to go, I knew I had to be there. The only way I could do it would be to sell my car. I had no money to pay my bills and get a plane ticket. If I sold my car I would be able to stay a little while. My car was the last thing I had of any value and it had a little over twenty thousand miles on it and was in mint condition. The Angels told me to sell it and it was a decision that would prove to be perfection.
When I went to Saint Louis it would be three years before I made it back to Los Angeles. My first day with my mom having lunch I said, "I'm going to be a vegetarian starting today." My mom couldn't believe what I had said. It was so out of the blue because I loved steak and ate meat almost every day. From that day forward though I never ate meat again and it was effortless. I knew it wasn't a decision from me that Heaven had to do with it. Literally out of the blue and overnight I became a vegetarian.
After my mom's surgery, it was clear she needed greater help than anyone knew. She lived in a one bedroom apartment so I was sleeping on the couch. I had lived almost twenty-five years by myself and my mom had lived by herself as well. We both had to adjust to new living. I kept paying on my LA apartment knowing one day I would be back. I never finished unpacking when I left for Saint Louis. My apartment was still in boxes with sheets covering the windows. After being in Saint Louis a few weeks I began caring for people in the neighborhood that were homeless. Quickly there were about eleven people I would feed, give water, and money to on a regular basis. They each had a beautiful innocence and would become my saviors.
During this time my mom wasn't doing so well and soon after the first surgery needed to have another. The Angels were also right she had been doubling her pills and not knowing it. She was starting to have dementia. I wasn't sure how long I was going to be there and was doing some work for Marianne Williamson an NY Times best-selling author. I met Marianne years ago after doing the marketing for an event called Peacelink Live.
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Peacelink live was an event for 11.11.11. Which I was involved with because I realized I wasn’t going to be a singer and that had been my childhood dream. My life was only living for me to sing. I was so devastated I didn’t know how I was going to live. There wasn’t anything else I thought I could do. The pain was so great I began questioning everything. With deep questions about why money was the way of life, why people were homeless and war was existing. I wanted to know what was creating the suffering in humans and why we weren't saving people like we should be. Who created the order and systems everyone was following. I wanted to find a way to help.
There was an online posting about a meeting for Peacelink live that I went to and from that meeting I began doing the marketing for the event. It was a global peace initiative with spiritual visionaries and musicians from all over the world and Marianne graciously participated. She was one of the headliners of the event that made it possible which it was a tremendous success.
I learned of Marianne Williamson through this event and afterward went to one of her lectures. Shortly after going I began volunteering to help her. At her talks, she spoke about the principles of a book called, “A Course In Miracles.” She clearly had a gift in communication and understanding humanity. Everything she spoke of resonated except her use of the word God. Religion had turned me off to God because it didn’t live what it preached. When I would hear someone use the word God I would always say under my breath universe or think universe in my mind. While I never did the workbook her lectures and way of life always blessed me deeply. Her understanding of humanity’s problems and her solutions for living better always resonated. God clearly blessed her with the ability to save humanity. By doing the work for Marianne I was able to keep my apartment in LA.
I didn’t know how long I was going to be in Saint Louis and was using a green shopping bag as my dresser. During the day I would hide it under a table. It was a little challenging to live in the living room knowing it was my moms living space but we were making it work. My mom started needing help at night and early morning because of her pain. I had changed from the couch to sleeping on an air mattress but it was hard getting up and down at all hours of the night. Then deflating it every morning, and remaking it again at night became too much to do on little sleep. It was like changing your bedsheets twice a day. Eventually, I started sleeping in a recliner with just a blanket and it was incredibly peaceful. Waking up at all hours of the night was easier. I learned that matter was a nothingness and the meaning we placed in the couch made it what it was. We could sleep on a couch, bed, chair or floor and make it anything we wanted through how we placed meaning. It could mean anything and that level of meaning would decide our peace or suffering.
My mom had three dogs that were beyond precious but weren’t very house trained and would make messes. They were little Chihuahua rescues. I soon had a good routine down for caring for them. They blessed me with so much Love and I was grateful to play with them. It was a very interesting time because it felt as if I was battling between Heaven and the devil. Many days there was a very profound darkness and sometimes things would happen that didn’t make sense. The experiences I had with the devil could range from him coming through people in very profound levels, changing matter from what was a blessing to evil and trying to keep upset over happiness in my life. The mortal world is an illusion that is malleable through energy and only existing at one level of consciousness. If every human being could experience how malleable the world is they would know the illusion is only one level of consciousness.
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During my time in Saint Louis the attacks from that organization ended but the darkness that came from it was the devil trying to stop me from living Christ. God was having a greater presence in my life. I was praying constantly and in conversation with God and His Angels non-stop. I began writing in my spare time what God was trying to teach me about humanity's creation. Love was the only level I was learning to live. The Angels told me I was going to live Christ consciousness. I learned the devil in humanity's consciousness was the darkness in my life and I was living through the devil to save humanity. When I chose Love while having my life destroyed it was Heaven that opened. My Angels were helping me to have greater knowledge and wisdom about life. The more Love I lived the greater God was in my light. Love would rid the darkness.
There were many nights in Saint Louis that different heavenly levels of energy would be there. Some were different shapes and objects with no facial features but could communicate. They would hover a couple feet from my face and be able to telepathically speak to me. I started learning about Conscious Energy and experiencing them in matter. Conscious Energy is the fabric of our world and giving us our livingness in matter. They are the species living in the conscious space of God. They could make my bottle of water feel like it weighed fifteen pounds. They could even make the bottle cap impossible to twist off. They're literally in every level of matter giving us the ability to touch our faces, see the earth and have a body. It was an amazing experience to live learning about the energy in our world including God in every atom. I was learning about photosynthesis and how matter was only one level of consciousness. Everything I was writing was helping me process God deeper.
I knew the devil was trying to stop me from realizing Christ consciousness but God was helping me go deeper into Him. I was slowly awakening to a different level of consciousness in Heaven. Every day I was learning more about living Love. My mom's health continued to decline and she was needing greater help. She was using a walker and wasn't able to dress like she once did. Her body was beginning to break down and her dementia was increasing. Soon after she began declining it seemed to catapult to worst. Her body wasn’t able to function like it did. I was helping her bathe, dress and doing her makeup and wigs.
We started going to the doctors frequently which was hard because I was driving an old Honda Pilot which is an SUV. She had trouble getting in and out. We used a step stool but I had to lift her in and maneuver her into the seat than do the seatbelt because she couldn’t do it. We began using wheelchairs when we were visiting doctors because her walking was becoming harder as well.
Soon I was cooking all of her meals and doing the grocery shopping. Which when I first got to Saint Louis my mom was walking on her own and some of the most amazing times was when we would go grocery shopping. She had an amazing zest for shopping. She would zoom around like a kid in a candy store finding anything and everything to buy.
As her health continued to decline though and her level of dementia was becoming much worst. We had different doctors for everything and her Alzheimer's doctor thought she was at a level of high medium to severe and was declining fairly fast. We lightly spoke about having more help to care for her but she didn't want people she didn’t know coming over or to be in assisted living. She was petrified of nursing homes and never wanted to be in one.
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Even after her surgeries when rehab people would come to help her heal it was a huge deal because she didn’t want anyone helping her. I made a promise to her that she would live her life at home and would never be in assisted living or a nursing home. Shortly thereafter everything escalated to a severe level of dementia. She would sometimes think I was her cousin Elsie or her mom. She also thought we had moved to a new home. Many times while helping her out of bed in the morning she would call me mom and wonder where she was.
She would always question my brothers and sisters on the phone about where she was as well. It was a constant question she had. I had one brother named Ricky and two sisters named Renee and Robin who lived out of state. My sister Renee was silly and made my mom giggle almost every night. She took over all of my moms finances and my other brothers and sisters kept her heart filled with Love and helped her live in peace. Everyone was such a blessing to my mom I don't think they ever knew how much they helped her and me during this time. My older brother Randy lived close and helped in all the ways he could.
Sometimes my family would need to stay on the phone with my mom while I watered the yard because she had begun falling. Because of the Alzheimers, her depth perception was terribly off and when she reached for something she would go off balance and fall. She also had a beautiful friend named Karen who would come over and sit with her while I went out to run errands or if I ever needed to leave her by herself she would always be there. We were using call buttons for her to page me if she needed to get up. At night when she needed to go to the bathroom she used the page button just like they have in hospitals. We had a toilet right next to her bed which helped tremendously but she was becoming wheelchair dependent and not able to get up easily.
Soon she was only in a wheelchair needing greater help. I was bathing her, dressing her, helping her after the restroom, helping her in and out of bed as well as cooking all of her meals. She was incontinent and every night sometimes more than once we would have to change her nightgown and bed pads. Everything became like a nursing home except she was at home. Her care was very profound and keeping her dignity was imperative. My mom had an amazing personality and outlook on life and was able to handle everything beyond any level I could imagine. She lived happy and her dogs loved her so much if she was in a chair they were on her lap. Her light was vibrant, strong and she was always an inspiration to everyone.
I learned how to change her nightgown, bed pads, and even her bedsheets sheets while she was still in bed. I had continued helping the homeless people in the neighborhood as well. They would come to the house and many times I would be tending to my mom but they would always wait until I had more time to help them. Many asked about my mom and prayed for her. My mom's heart was so big she always told me to help them. The living room was where we stayed the most and it was perfect because the front door was right there.
Throughout my three years caring for everyone God taught me more about living Love beyond society's level. Teaching me that the devil lives in consciousness trying to stop us from helping people. We judge them, turn our backs on them, live in fear and find reasons to not give in the light we should. We instead find faults and separate ourselves from loving them as Jesus would. When Jesus said, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." He meant it.
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In the beginning, there were many times when people would come to the door and I never had money but would jump in the car and go to an ATM to get them money. God taught me we give everything I could and then more. That everyone was Jesus. I would give what came out of the ATM which was twenty dollars. Sometimes it was twice a day and sometimes it was every day for three to four days straight. God was teaching me how to live Love at the level that gives to life. We’re to give everything we have in our wallets and not judge whether someone should get one dollar or five. The level to understand this from is our world is only living for us to live Love through it. If we judge everyone or we're worried they might be snookering us, we live the devils level and not Heavens. There is no reason to judge who receives more money than someone else when they are all innocent children of God in need of help. Even if they have a beer can or walk to a Mercedes it doesn’t matter, if they asked for help, help them. Life isn't about what they are doing it's about what we are living and living Love is our only purpose on earth. Ultimately there is only one of us here with God learning to live Love at the level of Christ consciousness.
We want to focus on living Love and letting God handle everything else. Love is the only level that matters. The Love we give is the Love we can live through. Learning to trust God and live at the level of Christ is a requisite for every human being. Faith is the matrimony of Heaven.
During the fall of my third year in Saint Louis, my mom's health declined and we began having home hospice. For my siblings that couldn’t be there, we created a Livestream webcam that was private. They could see my mom, hear her and speak to her twenty-four hours a day. My brother and I cared for her around the clock never leaving her side and escorted her into Heaven. August of 2017 she went to Heaven with an army of Angels at her side. My mom was the greatest blessing of my life and it was a privilege and honor to live caring for her. She blessed me in ways no one will ever know by turning on my light of Heaven with her Love.
When the time came for me to head back to Los Angeles I was living Christ consciousness with God deep in my life guiding me to live in Heaven. Today, I live in Heaven while here on earth with God teaching me about living Love, human consciousness and creation. This book is what I’ve learned living with God. It’s the beginning of humanity understanding what being alive is, who God is and the level of our world in Heaven. We are consciousness leaving self for light. Learning to live as energy instead of matter.
As we become more conscious of Love, life’s purpose and meaning, we understand God as life and that there is no separation between who we are and what He is.
